I have dated black women exclusively for the last ten years now and my “Dearest Princess Tonja” for the last four years. I look forward to marrying her as soon as she can come to Seattle where I have relocated recently. A wonderful job opportunity has brought me here and has caused us to be apart in the physical realm but I hold tight to the wonderful beauty and passion we have for each other.

We encounter some disparaging looks and comments from time to time but our love for one another emanates from such a deep well of adoration for one another that the intended effect that was intended to do harm to us is nullified by the presence of Gods protective aura which he has bestowed upon our lives.

It is my belief that the world will not know and understand peace until the races have effectively been blended into an amalgamation creating one holistic race. On one hand I am thankful that I live in this day because I personally have an attraction for truly dark black women. The darker the better. That’s my fetish. Now the darkness will fade from those Dark Nubian Princess’s and the lightness of those of my race will darken; and the future generations will have to wonder in awe at the diversity of the past but I pray they will be able to do so in a world of tranquility where the peoples of the world view one another as a copious potpourri of equals.

Kind Regards, DALLAS VERMILYEA

I’ve dated white men (I’m black) and I noticed three things:
1. Black people are more likely to stare rudely than white people are; however
2. If my white boyfriend was very good-looking, we would sometimes get nasty/puzzled looks from white women (“what is he doing with her when he could be with someone like me?”), but
3. Most black guys would give us the frowned-up face regardless. (“What is she doing with him when she could be with someone like me?”)

My sister has been married to a white guy for fifteen years and they have four children (all gorgeous and brilliant of course.)

In the midst of her child-bearing years, my sister became very fat, but has since had bypass surgery. Never one to bite his tongue, my BIL said that the only good thing about the time when Sis was fat was that he didn’t have black guys trying to pick fights with him every time they went out at night.

It’s all ego. In the case of men, just as white men of the Old South feared black men taking “their” women, so now do some black men have the same proprietary instinct toward black women. The effects are, of course, vastly dissimilar, but the attitude is the same.

As you can tell, my sister and I are both blindingly gorgeous.

Aside: I always try to be especially nice to black man/white woman couples because I know that all too many other black women are, conversely, giving them a very hard time. Ego.

Next month, my Filipina wife and I will celebrate our 24th wedding anniversary. When it comes to mixed race marriages, white man/asian woman has been around for a long time and no one seems to think anything about it. Being in a mixed race marriage, we have the opportunity to meet quite a few others. Black man/white woman is pretty common, especially in a military town. White man/black woman is less common but that describes some of our neighbors. Asian man/white or black woman seems pretty uncommon but we’ve known a few.

The real key with making any marriage work is compromise and love. In my case, my wife is a first generation immigrant. We have experienced far more challenges with that than with race. Beyond that, it’s no one else’s business.

Years ago, when “Guess Who’s Coming to Dinner” was released, it was accompanied by a barage of criticism over the fact that the young black husband was portrayed as a high class doctor instead of a lower class guy, presumably in order to make the story more acceptable to the intolerant movie audience. Nonsense.

Apparently, these critics were blind to the fact that the well-to-do young woman would have had nothing whatever in common with a car wash attendant, black or white. In addition, parents always want a good future for their daughter, so her finding a doctor would have fulfilled that normal wish.

The story clearly makes the point that the young couple had everything (that really matters) in common. And this is the key for real life couples as well. Race pales (literally) in comparison to the massive catalog of other factors.

“I can’t speak for…”

It appears you can’t even speak for black/white couples.

Wow, I’ve read some messed up stuff from ‘black’ or ‘white’ supremacist groups, but this is certainly on par with regards to blatant bigotry.

You are making three points right there in the above quote, and they say rather a lot about your view of the world:

1. ‘Black’ women are desperate or sick unless they are with a black man.

2. White men are ‘below par’.

3. Black women are shallow.

Nice going. It’s encouraging to know that every single individual has a character pre-determined by the shade of their skin. Thanks.

Do you have a chart that marks the shades between black and white? And at what point on this chart does any individual cease to be the ‘preferred’ representative personality?

Sorry, but, that is nonsense. I guess it’s hard to expect much more from a such a generalized/stereotypical/hyperboled premise as the topic’s question presents, yet people have responded with heartwarming stories of multiracial relationships nonetheless. I suppose all that’s left to divide the happy stories are the naysayers , the racialists, and the weak-kneed.

Urgh.

Black men who do it are trying to escape who they are. I mean any black man who is with a white woman would not be with the same woman if she was black. Even gay black men have a preference for white men. White men who get with black women are trying to get a sort of testosteronic validation that they can please someone who has been with black men. Smart black women don’t fall for this transparent game. BW/WM unions are born out of rejection. If you dig into the history of these individuals, few people of their own races wanted them, so they run to each other. Ask any ’sister’ why she ended up with a white man and she will almost always say something in the realm of “there aren’t many brothers out there” or “all the black men I want are with white women.” Sounds like the start of a healthy relationship to me.

That first interracial kiss..YOWZA YOWZA YOWZA!!!

Can you say more about that? I’m not sure what you are getting at, with regard to my specific comments.

The thing is that when race enters the picture, it would be easy to chalk up problems to race. I remember once having a black friend of mine say that a mutual aquaintance was rude to her because she was black. However, that mutual aquaintance was rude to everyone and a collosal jerk.

I think that race can be a handy dumping ground to get away from the hard work of the human condition.

http://findarticles.com/p/articles/mi_m1077/is_2_56/ai_67531410

“Similarly, our readers contradicted the notion that skin color plays an important role when Black men are considering whom to date or marry. More than 75 percent of the men in our survey say that skin color does not matter to them at all when assessing a woman’s attractiveness. Nearly 80 percent say they would never discount a woman as a potential mate based on whether she was too light or too dark.”

“One reason for this may be the somewhat mixed perception these men have of Black women. About one-third say a supportive Black woman is hard to find. Just over 43 percent said that the behavior of some of their peers has made it difficult for Black women to be supportive of Black men. But more than half (52.2 percent) think Black women are only looking for men with money and status.

All relationships have difficulties.

An interracial rel can be just as strong as a non interracial one. Every single person – biracial or not – faces some sort of difficulty in life. A Jewish child would run into trouble because it is Jewish – but that child deserves to experience life, does it not? To assume that because it will run into added problems being biracial, and therefore does not deserve to be brought into existence… well, I’d say maybe you should reconsider your motives for worrying.

“She has been conditioned by our society to believe that “white” is pretty and “black” is ugly”

["so she sometimes/many times has self esteem issues and questions if I think she is pretty."]

Darin my friend, if I can be allowed to give a little explicitly male centric perspective. The phenomenon you describe is inherent to our better halves, and not necessarily related to race!